2021.12.04 21:12 soulfulsolos Time Solo - Pink Floyd (love this tone)
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2021.12.04 21:12 rorodj [m4F] Who needs some head?
2021.12.04 21:12 faelyab My (22F) girlfriend (21F) is wishing for me to move out, have no contact, yet stay friends and a break after getting diagnosed with a burnout. Any advice on this?
Hello people of Reddit! First things first, this is all simply from my perspective. I really don't want to put her into a bad daylight, but as I am in the process of seeking help and cannot receive counseling for this just yet, I figured I'd try asking my questions here. Not that that's an equivalent for counseling, but it still might give me some insights. Here goes.
I'd first like to give you all some context on the situation. I met my girlfriend at the end of last year. We quickly hit it off. I was currently in a pretty rough stage, which i communicated to her pretty early on; I was from an abusive household and because of my mental (in)stability, working, moving out and being independent didn't work out for me. It turned out we basically went through the same life, which hasn't been an easy one. We realized that the similarities could either result into us lifting each other up, or dragging each other down. It's always been us lifting each other up, but lately it's been the latter. We started dating pretty early, and because of my unsafe home situation, I moved in with her after a month of us dating. I know how this sounds and it all felt like it was done out of necessity. The mental healthcare in our country is far from optimal, and during the pandemic most of us are kind of asked to make the best of it. I'm still incredibly grateful for such a young person, who has had her own difficulties in life, and no reason to trust me, open up her heart and home to me.
As I moved in with her, the first issue was getting a job and holding onto it so I could help support us too. It was quite hard to find a job in the pandemic. I noticed early on that her job was pretty unhealthy and exploitative, and that it stressed her out, which I frequently spoke up about to her, expressing my concerns. I found a job in the late spring, and was able to work there until recently. My mental health deteriorated severely in the meantime, unfortunately and I haven't been the easiest.
I have had a lot of mental breakdowns, an increase in su*cidal thoughts (which I'm trying to seek help for, I have never threatened nor attempted). I can only imagine this has been so hard for her and that a person has their limits. Her mental health was deteriorating just as fast, in a nearly identical pace, so I really fear I have been the one to start dragging her down. I never wanted that. I wish I hadn't. In the meantime, we were looking for a bigger place to live together. I wondered and asked my girlfriend many times if I should not try and look for my own apartment. In my mind, if this worked out, we had all the time in the world to live together again when the housing market isn't such a mess. She disagreed, saying it worked out fine and that she wanted us to be in this together. It was also cheaper. I thought she was right and for the rest of our relationship we've always been looking for a bigger place to truly start living our life together by choice, not out of necessity. We responded to every house we could find, every single day, but to no avail. With our mental health deteriorating, I quit my job and she supported me in this, reassuring she could support us while I try to be on welfare. I saw her tumbling down a dark hole too and wondered if she had a burnout. Her symptoms basically ticked all the boxes, she went to get help, got therapy, then a diagnosis followed and she finally took time off work. I was stressed about this point in our lives, but also excited to see the light at the end of the tunnel again. Her burnout unfortunately hasn't seemed to allow her to feel the same. Which makes sense. Her coming out of that fight or flight mode allowed her to feel all of the awful feelings she had to suppress in her daily life before this.
She asked for us to stay with the parent I fled from (the other parent has disowned me for my sexuality and unfortunately is also abusive, nearly the exact same goes for my partner). However, my relationship with said parent had improved drastically as they had gotten help. I agreed. From the moment we were here, I caught all the blows. It was really rough on me and spoke up about this many times. She did tell me that we were free to leave anytime, but as she kept expressing her worries about being in our tiny studio together again with no space, I understood and tried to stay at my parents' house with her. Once here, she's been away, going to her parent, who has expressed concerning behavior in the past which I cannot go into detail about, out of respect for their relationship. Not my story to tell. I've expressed these concerns, but I understand like no other that the need for a good bond with a parent, and the loyalty a child has for a parent, both run very deep. But it caused me to be stuck at my parent's place. That was because she won't allow me to stay there anymore, regardless of whether she's currently there or not. This was extremely out of character for her, and it all started with her suddenly telling me that she wanted to live my herself in the apartment again, and wanted me to occassionally visit again. This was a huge blow for me. When confronting her about this, she was overwhelmed by how emotional I was, as if my emotions about this were blown out of proportion. She then took it back, explaining it was "simply a wish of hers". I have decided that I won't be going back.
Lately I'd noticed she was less affectionate, both verbally and physically. I figured this was because of her burnout. Eventually she just treated me like a friend, which really concerned and hurt me, as I'm her lover and I still want to be loved and desired actively. I expressed it, to which she reacted defensively, asking me when I had done anything to make her feel special. I tried to point out things, we agreed to disagree. The convo left me feeling pretty unheard and unseen in this. I eventually told her that I was seriously considering a break and asked her how she felt. We agreed to give things one more try before taking a break. After her suddenly wishing for me to move out, nothing's been the same. That conversation took place after me expressing I was considering a break. She proposed to talk about it all the next day.
Ever since then, she's been avoiding me. Angry or scared whenever I express emotions, or take up space. Not communicating. Not texting unless I text her. At first I made the mistake of reacting very emotionally, spamming her with all the questions I had, all the concerns and begging to meet up, to call, to talk things out. I eventually reached out to friends. I know I shouldn't speculate, but this sudden blow was one I could not afford and still don't know how to cope with at all. I can't pick up my things, as she has the keys to the place. My friend told me that she might just really not be able to handle anything at the moment and that she simply feels apathetic about everything, and cannot feel anything for me romantically right now. I called up my girlfriend. She confirmed. It was the first conversation where I could normally communicate with her for the first time in a minute, but it required me extremely walking on eggshells, asking no questions, asking for no comfort and no accountability. That still really hurts me. We both decided on a break. She still wants to talk during this break, on her terms and platonically. I thought I could give that to her, but that's just my codependency, I fear. I don't want to be her friend. She is indeed my best friend, but most importantly my lover and she has been for most of the time that I've known her. Against all the odds, we made it work. I thought it was just a case of "right person, wrong time", but I'm starting to feel so, so, so abandoned. Like there's no space for me anymore and others have to comfort me for the hurt this relationship does to me. She often ignores me, texts me whenever she wants, doesn't attempt to comfort me, acknowledge or validate my feelings. During the holidays and her birthday, she's suddenly planning to go abroad. She doesn't know whether she wants to break up, nor does she seem to want to figure it out. She has other things on her mind, which I can imagine. But right now I'm left with a lot of bills I can't pay, our pet cat who's with me, my abusive parent who suddenly has to house me again, and a broken heart.
I've been so incredibly hurt, troubled and confused by this all. I don't know the person I'm talking to at all and with my past, my love for her, and to be honest, my codependency, I have absolutely no idea how to cope with me being unsure about everything. I just don't know whether to hold on tight or to let go. This sudden forced transition from "us" to "me" again has been very hard on me. I get that a person has their limits, and I'm grateful for everything she's done for me. But a lot of my boundaries have been crossed and I feel so unloved, unseen and unheard. This really messed me up.
Does anyone have any advice on how to possibly cope with this? Thank you so much for reading and your time.
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2021.12.04 21:12 HippieDogeSmokes Can any IOS players say what the current item shop is?
2021.12.04 21:12 ZoobBot 190508
2021.12.04 21:12 KimCureAll A chicken's impressive flight across a snowy field
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2021.12.04 21:12 CalicoFlannel Recent edition of Woman's World labels Stowe as "dream getaway" in two-page spread.
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2021.12.04 21:12 isitpossible55 Getting exhausted to comprehend it all
2021.12.04 21:12 StoneyJoJo Noticed this poster halfway through my pee in the only office bathroom.
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2021.12.04 21:12 ender3838 Does the US military have a standard for countdowns?
Hey does the millitary have a standard for countdowns like “3 2 1”? Like do they go “3 2 1 “and go on 1 or do they do “3 2 1 go” and go after. I feel like that’s a thing they should standardize
submitted by ender3838 to Military [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 21:12 Virtual_Button191 I’m low key getting pumped to play revamped with all the new coaching changes and high profile recruits in the transfer portal.
2021.12.04 21:12 struggi123 This photo of my Supra
2021.12.04 21:12 Murr0974 [XB1] H: trade W: courier
2021.12.04 21:12 Drexlore 2022 3* S Jourdan Thomas commits to Tennessee
2021.12.04 21:12 DullPaleontologist93 Recoger VISA en flete chavales
Hice el proceso para una VISA estudiantil. Me fue aprobada y tenia que pasar a retirar el pasaporte en flete chavales desde el 21 de noviembre. No sabia que solo tenia 14 dias para buscarlo, esos 14 dias expiraban hoy. Me dicen que si no lo pasaba a buscar en los 14 dias pierdo mi pasaporte. Nose si con esto se refieren a que lo regresan a la embajada y lo busco alla o que es lo que procede exactamente. Please HELP si alguien paso por lo mismo!
submitted by DullPaleontologist93 to Panama [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 21:12 infinitysaga You hate to see it
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2021.12.04 21:12 elirx215 Not based on a true story
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2021.12.04 21:12 NinjasLeftNut Happy 26th Birthday to Anthony Martial!
2021.12.04 21:12 BloodOfLoki Majority of lawmakers in 116th Congress are millionaires
2021.12.04 21:12 z0rkbro astra main question
main astra and solo queue. been stuck diamond 3 that past 2 weeks, anytime i get near immortal my team chokes(i’m not perfect either). is it even possible to solo queue into immortal as an astra lmao
submitted by z0rkbro to VALORANT [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 21:12 sidewinderaw11 [WTS] Seiko Alpinist SBDC117/SPB157 - $540 shipped
2021.12.04 21:12 Special_Yogurt837 If I were too make an NPC Tournament with every Pokémon trainer from every generation, should I revert changes done too previous Pokémon for trainers from older generations + other stupid questions
Quite the mouthful title, lol
Anyway, this project I’m doing all stemmed from a youtuber named Pimanrules where he took every trainer in Pokémon red and made them fight in a round robin tournament. I watched it a couple months ago and I thought it was pretty cool. It made think what would the results be for other generations. I pondered on it but I eventually forgot about it and moved on. I rewatched it a couple weeks ago and my overly-ambitious mind asked “What if I did something like this but instead of being a round-robin tournament I setup a twitch stream that would have every Pokémon trainer across from the games fight each other endlessly for viewers too bet on similar to saltybet?”
My mind went crazy thinking about that ideaand I am now attempting to work on this project and hopefully in a year or two get it up and running (probably not lol). While I was working on this project though a major problem occurred. How do I treat Pokémon that have changed across the generations? The solution too me was just too make a new form for that Pokémon that was changed and revert it back too it’s original. An easy example of this is something like cantina where I just create a duplicate form of gengar but with levitate. What I realized though is that by doing I would a create a huge rabbit hole of issues but if I don’t do thjs I feel like I wouldn’t be giving the character justice. So I decided too come and ask the internet for help because the internet is always right. If you could give me feedback on this question as well as other questions I have I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you!
Should Pokémon trainers be able too use items they had in their original games? (Full restore, x items, etc)
Should all trainers Pokémon be set too 50 or should their Pokémon’s level be unchanged?
Should battle facility masters be included?
Should Pokémon changes be reverted for trainers from the generation before the change?
What determines what ability a Pokémon will have if their game didn’t feature abilities in the first place?
For games that have DVs instead of IVs, what should determine what IVs a Pokémon trainers pokemon have?
Should Pokémon trainers from games that don’t have EV systems have maxed out stats like in the original?
Should I take into account LGPEs candy system for trainers that utilize it?
Should a signature move/ability of a pokemon be reverted if the trainer is from before the change (ex:kings shield being -2 instead of -1 or gale wings always having priority to only having priority at full health)?
That’s all of the questions for now , will edit later if I have more.
submitted by Special_Yogurt837 to PokemonROMhacks [link] [comments]
2021.12.04 21:12 Gebieter33 Faulty RTX 3070 ?
Last year i built a pc with a RTX 3070, Ryzen 3700x, msi b550m mortar and a corsair rm850x Psu and everything worked fine, but after bit over half a year or so my Pc started behaving weird like: some frame dips, black screens that needed restart, weirdly long boot times and some rare shading errors. Now i thought okay maybe reinstalling graphics driver , updating bios, Chipset and windows might help. But nothing Helped and problems got even worse when i wanted to install Nvidia drivers, screen went black while install and i couldnt do anything but reset. So now i wanted to reinstall windows and go with a fresh install and while i’m at upgrade to Win 11 so i won’t get a surprise upgrade like what happend with Win10. When i finished installing win11 and updating it i got a black screen in every 10seconds that lasted a second or two wich i tried by reinstalling the Nvidia drivers but i just got a blackscreen again and when i tried reinstalling win 10 i got the same Black screen on and off thing again with a box on the bottom right telling me it’s trying to force install graphics drivers. As last resort i tried installing it in my brothers pc where i tested the card when i bought it and it again didn’t install drivers like i mentioned above.
Am i right in thinking my GPU is defective?
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2021.12.04 21:12 Syllogism19 JFK Jr is alive QAnon crowd at Christmas parade in Dallas....
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2021.12.04 21:12 raffu280 CNN terminates Chris Cuomo "effective immediately"
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